It used to make me cringe, make me so upset. I’ve connected with your children so why wouldn’t I understand. But that phrase is so very true. There should also be one for parents of just girls/ boys, parents with now teenagers, parents that forget that some of us are walking in these parent shoes for the first time.
When talking to parents of older kiddos, things have changed so much since their kids were toddlers.
School requirements, health “suggestions”, medical terminology, parent involvement. Now, I am not totally sure that some of this is because of the boat we row with the boys and delays and more pressure from therapists and doctors and school districts, but it’s my observation.
There are however a few things that are not fact, no matter how they are stated to me.
- Leo is not going to grow out of his Autism
- Max is not just quiet
- My children aren’t “just normal toddlers” (I wish they were just normal)
- I am not a helicopter mom
- I literally cannot accept help during certain hours of the day, due to therapy being at home.
- My child will not, at 4 years old, ride a bus to school
- Helping others with kids does not make you a parent
I can’t count the times things like these rack my brain. How could someone say something like that to me, how can you think that letting phrases like this out of your mouth aren’t hurtful. Because they are. In this season of life, it’s rough, it’s exhausting, it is what it is and we will get through it.
Sometimes, before letting phrases that can hurt escape your mouth remember that you aren’t a parent, or you haven’t parented toddlers in a long time, that you once went through all of this for the first time, that you were very blessed to have children that didn’t need extra hands, that just letting someone in a very busy and dark time know that you love them is enough.