After appointments, assesments, ear tubes, hearing exams and my mommy gut being in over drive, we were told that although unable to officially diagnose Leo, he had “Autstic-like” characteristics and was officially qualified for therapies through the CVRC program.

B-I-T-T-E-R-S-W-E-E-T

It was both the best and worst day I had encountered  since giving birth to Leo 2 1/2 years prior. I was so relieved that my mommy gut knew something wasn’t right. I was so sad that it was autism. Why did it have to be something there is no cure for. If it had to be something, why in the world did it have to be something that is a spectrum, that changes all of the time? How were we going to do this? We have this beautiful toddler with eyes that sparkle, who loves dinosaurs, who wants to play with others, who can’t communicate with me. How?

So I prayed. I asked God to lead us. I asked him to show me what to do for my family. I asked him to grow my heart and patience in HUGE amounts, to open my mind and my heart to everything I needed to learn to help make him better. And to not forget that our Max needed to be loved on at the same time.

And he answered my prayers. I was introduced to an amazing group of women through church that had either been through the process that we were just starting or were starting to go through the same thing. We had the sweetest speech teacher that gave me so much hope. God has placed amazing women in our life that have helped Leo, taught Joel and myself and loved on Max.

And I realized when he was officially diagnosed a few months later that I definately believed. There is no way I could have gotten through this without putting it into Gods hands. I needed to give my worry and my sadness to a higher power, to someone that could guide me, to someone who knows our path as a family. It was a sense of calm for me.  It helped me relax and be open to what professionals needed to tell me.

So one year ago today my life changed in so many ways. Wasn’t sure how to deal with any of them at the moment but in hindsight October 9, 2013 was an amazing day in my life.

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